Ah, the Comeback!


Or rather a little bit of an effort at doing so.

It’s been so long since I wrote last. So long in fact that I don’t even remember when I wrote last time. perhaps a year ago……. I don’t know. And I’m too lazy to check it.

Anyway, a 14 year old motivated me to write again. She’s the sweetest little thing ever! I don’t really know her but it feels like I do. I’ve been thinking of writing again for a long while but its as if all my will to do so and my motivation for writing took a hike. A long one at that!

Its good to be back even though I don’t know if I would be doing this with any consistency. I just wanted to acknowledge the presence of a special 14 year old in my life. Welcome little “Special agent Derek Bobson!” You have been a beam of light in my otherwise dull and frustrating life recently. And I appreciate that more than you can ever imagine!

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Diary Entry: Ages Passed


Dear diary,
ages have passed since I last wrote in here. I can’t even remember when I did. Anyway, my first semester has long been over. I’m done with one of my mid term exams. Two left to go. My Placement viva for Adult psychopathology is finally over and I passed with flying colours. I’m still top most in my class. But you know me, I don’t really deserve that. I don’t work for it!
Anyway, I’ve made a new friend and I’m in love with one of my teachers. She’s a big motivating person in my life now a days, for which I’m very much thankful. She urges me to be better and do better. University life doesn’t suck as much either. I miss Islamabad, very much. The nature, the beauty that used to calm me down, its long gone. I miss that so much! I have developed a very bad habit ever since I came to Lahore. I start studying an hour or so before my exam. The rest of the time, I keep wasting.
Living in a room without a big window is frustrating. I often feel down. And those are the times when my teacher usually comes in handy. I enjoy talking to her. I’m super attached. She has grown attached too. But I miss when I’m unable to talk to her. And I do realize that she’s an extremely busy person. But I can’t help it!
Right now, I feel a little down because it’s been days since I’ve had a chance to talk to her properly. Oh no, not because I’m not free but because she isn’t. She’s going to be our new head of department. On one hand, I love the idea and on the other, I worry, she would be way more busy than usual and then I won’t have enough time to talk to her :/ Man! that sucks! And being super attached to someone sucks too!
I should probably go and try to hold myself together.
See you soon, if life permits!

Ciao

Diary entry 119


Dear diary,
I know,its been too long since I last wrote. I wasn’t short of words of incidents to report, it was just lack of motivation. But from past one day, I have been driven crazy by my unruly thoughts. I’m not gonna say what nightmares I have had for past some days. Some things are better left alone, untouched. Some secrets are better buried deep in damp, cold and the darkest part of the soul.
The good thing is, I’m going to start a Tajweed class this week In Sha Allah. I’m pretty excited about it.
Yesterday was my second time to drive a car but first time, without any supervision. I enjoyed every bit of the experience. Hoping to get great at it very soon.
Argh, not writing for so long has its own negative effects. My mind is numb and all muddled up. I dunno what I’m writing and how. Nothing seems  right and nothing seems to matter at this very moment. I just want to lie down and sleep,without any more waiting.
Any hopes and chances of me writing anything good today are equal to zero, but I might pop up early in the morning to try again. For now, I better hit the bed and try to catch up on some lost hours of sleep.
Chao!