Diary entry 98

Dear diary,

I’ve been a little out of sorts lately. Haven’t been able to sleep properly. Health is better but my mind is so messed up. And the sleep deprivation. . . . . My eyes hurt. And I have a deep urge to cry. I don’t know how much my mind is responsible for this feeling beside the hurting eyes. There are days in every person’s life when they want to let go and cry hard. Days when they want to be taken care of, for a change. Days when even the bravest and strongest of the people want to be treated like a fragile being………
Its my day today. Its my moment of weakness I guess. I want a break from being strong for myself and for others, just a little break. . . . a tear or two, to escape my eyes. . . . because those who cry are not weak. Those who dare to cry, they are strong enough to let go. Tears aren’t a sign of weakness. They are a person’s strength, a way of saying, “I’ve had too much. I have tolerated enough. Its time to say goodbye to the past and to future; aye, aye!”

Well, I’m doing the same right now. Preparing myself for whatever life has in store for me. I’m strong again. I have shed my worries, my doubts and my fears with these tears, that dry on my face right now. I’ve learned that the more you feel self-pity, the more miserable you become. That’s not an option for me. It never was.
So once again, this soldier is ready to take on all the battles that come her way. Once again, out in the open, fighter mode on 🙂
P.S: Another post coming on next(in a bit 🙂 Yup, mind and creative spirit is in over drive these days or something.)

there,I did it again!

I was down with fever and a nasty throat some days back.While fever helped me have my very well deserved break-1st in 3 months-It made me see clearer.I realized some of the things that I realize every time I get sick but forget soon after I gain health.Aside from all the usual arguing,teasing and banter,they care for me A LOT.And if there were no arguments and teasing,life would be too boring.

Thanks to Allah,fever is over and I’m healthy as a horse-oh no,wait-I still have this irritating flu on.Apart from the obvious hate for this flu,I love the way it makes my voice sound 😀

Though I’m with my one hand holding my nose to avoid another . . . . .A-A-A . . . .

there I did it again!!!