Diary entry 98


Dear diary,

I’ve been a little out of sorts lately. Haven’t been able to sleep properly. Health is better but my mind is so messed up. And the sleep deprivation. . . . . My eyes hurt. And I have a deep urge to cry. I don’t know how much my mind is responsible for this feeling beside the hurting eyes. There are days in every person’s life when they want to let go and cry hard. Days when they want to be taken care of, for a change. Days when even the bravest and strongest of the people want to be treated like a fragile being………
Its my day today. Its my moment of weakness I guess. I want a break from being strong for myself and for others, just a little break. . . . a tear or two, to escape my eyes. . . . because those who cry are not weak. Those who dare to cry, they are strong enough to let go. Tears aren’t a sign of weakness. They are a person’s strength, a way of saying, “I’ve had too much. I have tolerated enough. Its time to say goodbye to the past and to future; aye, aye!”

Well, I’m doing the same right now. Preparing myself for whatever life has in store for me. I’m strong again. I have shed my worries, my doubts and my fears with these tears, that dry on my face right now. I’ve learned that the more you feel self-pity, the more miserable you become. That’s not an option for me. It never was.
So once again, this soldier is ready to take on all the battles that come her way. Once again, out in the open, fighter mode on 🙂
P.S: Another post coming on next(in a bit 🙂 Yup, mind and creative spirit is in over drive these days or something.)

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