Desire


Seeing you with someone else
Is my personal share of hell
I don’t feel jealous, I don’t cry
But my inside just wants to die
I burn, I ache, I writhe in pain
I wither, I crumble, I withdraw
Until what’s left is a mute me
Insane, coward, the living dead
No, I’m still not jealous
And it’s just pain, it will pass
I knew you were bad
But I entered danger zone
I took the chance
Now I burn in fire
Of my own desire
Alone, waiting for you!

Diary entry 96


Dear diary,
I haven’t started studying yet and it my paper in the morning. Eyes keep hurting these days, sleep cycle has gone awry, imagination is running wild. It’s like I don’t live in this world anymore. On one hand, these feelings are lovely but on the other hand they sometimes scare me. I mean being so happy might come with a price too. There is a part in me that’s preparing me for that big moment. But on the whole, I’m happy and it’s difficult not to be. I have the “bestest” friend,always around me, making me laugh, sometimes makes me blush and sometimes challenges me in various different ways. What else can a person ask for?!

Anyway, today DIG of Islamabad came just around mess time to sort out the things. Thank God! Somebody is paying attention at least. These hypocritical management people would’ve eaten the innocent female population alive if there wasn’t anyone before whom they were accountable. Do you want me to say it now, “On your face!!!?” Or would you like to put up some more stunts before we win again and say it, dear university management?
Anyway, Chloe is waiting for me to finish writing so that we can start studying.
So, gotta go……

Catch you some time later In Sha Allah!